A Kid's-Eye View of the Economy

This is part of a conversation that took place in the car this morning. I wrote it all down when we got to our destination so I didn't forget.

Little K: If you gave a slug a shell, would it be a snail?
Me: Um, no...
Little K: What is a slug, anyway?
Me: I don't know...a slimy, gooey, gross thing?
Little K: It's a homeless snail.
(Laughter)
Little K: It's a snail with housing problems.
(More laughter)
Big K: Maybe the bank foreclosed and took its home.

Funny and yet not funny at the same time. How much do I wish that my kids didn't know the word "foreclose". And people say that kids don't listen.

Vindication - Sort Of

I took J-Man into U of M hospital this afternoon to see an orthopedic surgeon. The kid walks on his toes and I've been trying to get a doctor to listen to me for awhile about it. Finally got a prescription for physical therapy a couple of months back, which did no good and was completely frustrating. Plus, the physical therapist thought I was an idiot (I'm just the mom, you know) so it was super fun all around.

So this afternoon the surgeon told me that the muscles and tendons in my son's legs are REAAAALLLY tight and that he will need surgery to correct it. If we don't fix it, the problem will get progressively worse and he will have hip and back problems in the future. He will have to wear braces, probably for the rest of his life (but eventually just at night), to keep it from getting out of control again.

Look at that. Just mom was right.

Trust

It hit me this morning as Big K was relating an incident (aka tattling) about her brother, that I'm tired. It's exhausting to live with a child that you can't trust.

J-Man has no internal compulsion to be obedient. The only reason to do the right thing is to avoid getting in trouble. Consequences do not work (but don't worry, we still use them) because he can't see past the immediate satisfaction of getting or doing what he wants. He also lacks the ability to generalize from one situation to another. Therefore, even though he's six years old, he has to be supervised like a toddler. For example, I watch him when he uses the bathroom to make sure he doesn't stick his head in the toilet, flush four times or dig trenches in the bar of soap. He's done all of that and more...repeatedly.

If J-Man is unable to see an adult, it's every man, boy, girl and animal for him or herself. This applies not only to obedience issues, but also to his treatment of others. If he thinks that I can't see or hear him (heaven forbid I take a shower), he drops his mask. As he hasn't yet fine-tuned the "art of sneaky", I can often catch him at this. We also have a blanket rule applying to the cat. He's not allowed to touch her. The poor cat suffered some abuse in the first days after J-Man came home, so we're pretty vigilant now.

There's no respect for the property of others. J-Man spends a lot of time in a large baby gate playing with toys that I rotate in and out. If I lose track of him, I'm asking for trouble. He will steal or break things without a second thought and then get upset because his sisters are mad at him. I've found that prevention is the best medicine on this front.

And he is the most convincing liar you've ever seen. Unless I saw it with my own eyes (or one of the girls will vouch for it) I cannot believe anything (and I mean anything) that J-Man says. He will stake out a claim and stick with it. Even when I tell him that I know he's lying because I saw what he did he will continue, with conviction and while sobbing "you never believe me", to dig himself further into a hole. He must be threatened with something scary (like missing lunch) in order to 'fess up.

As I said, it's tiring. He's a perpetual toddler in a body that keeps getting bigger. We've decided to send him to school in the fall. Hopefully the structure will be good for him and the break from the constant battles will be good for me. I've never looked forward to September so much in my life.

Free Shipping at Powells

I LOVE this store. Through the 18th, you can get free shipping on any size order. Which is great if you only need one book, not the stack of 50 that I usually order!

Powell's Books

Imperceptible

Do you want to know one of the most frustrating parts about having MS? I don't look sick. Which can actually also be a blessing...you can only take so much pity, after all. But on the other hand, my family tends to forget that I don't operate at full steam anymore. Ever. Even on good days.

Need a nap in the afternoon?
Tough.
Don't feel like I can handle that social obligation?
Too bad.
Not up to making dinner?
Wait...what? This is going to affect us? Hold on, we didn't sign up for this.
Stinks, doesn't it. I didn't volunteer for it, either.

And for all the forgetting that they're able to do, I can never forget. Among other things, my eyesight is shot, my skin burns, my left hand goes numb and I'm incredibly, overwhelmingly exhausted on some days. I am reminded, even as I sit here and type with my right eye closed, that things are awry.

Not wanting pity. We have thankfully moved past that uncomfortable stage with most of our friends and acquaintances. What I would like is some understanding and support. I am not faking, I did not have that spinal tap and 3 MRIs for fun, and I do not enjoy planning my days around my symptoms. If I can minimize stress and avoid becoming overtired, I can maximize my ability to function on a daily basis. But I'm finding that it takes cooperation from those around me. Which would be easier to get if I looked sick.

And there's the rub.