My Poor Starving Child

So J-Man came home from school today and the first words out of his mouth were:

You need to send more lunch tomorrow.

Now, I sent the same amount of food in his lunch today as I have sent for the past 3 weeks without complaint EXCEPT that I omitted the cookie. I decided that he was getting enough sugar from the jam on the sandwich and the fruit, so he didn't need a cookie. I informed him of my decision while I was packing his lunch this morning. So here's the rest of the conversation.

Me: So you were hungry? You must have eaten the snack I packed, right?
J-Man: (looking sideways) Some of it.
(I took the still full container of trail mix out of his bag.)
Me: Whoa! You couldn't have been that hungry since you didn't eat more than two peanuts out of here. Did you have anything else to eat during the day?
J-Man: Yes, an apple.
Me: Where did you get the apple?
J-Man: From the helper.
Me: So you told her that your mom didn't pack enough lunch and you were still hungry so she gave you an apple?
J-Man: Yes.
Me: Did you tell her that you had a snack in your bag?
J-Man: No.
Me: Did you tell her that you refused to eat the breakfast that I made for you this morning?
J-Man: No.
Me: So all you told her was that your mom didn't pack enough lunch?
J-Man: Yes.
Me: So she gave you an apple and told you to tell me that I should send more food tomorrow?
J-Man: Yes.
Me: I'm really looking forward to parent-teacher conferences.

So when the husband got home from work, he was trying to talk to J-Man about the whole lunch thing. Much of the conversation was a repeat from above until the end:

Dad: So you got an apple from the helper because you told her that you were still hungry?
J-Man: Yes.
Dad: But you didn't eat breakfast or your snack?
J-Man: No.
Dad: That wasn't a very good job.
J-Man: You know when you say that you're emptying my bucket.

Emptying his bucket!?!? You have got to be kidding!!! Can I just tell you how empty my bucket is? And I'm sure that call I'm going to get from the teacher tomorrow about my poor starving child is just going to fill it right up to the brim.

Emptying his bucket. Give me a break.